Friends are people you care about but who also care about you. There is a shared level of trust, respect and affection. It’s not about your mutual interests or how often you see each other (although that may have been part of how you first became friends) – it’s more than that.

When you both feel comfortable and relaxed in each others presence, when you can be yourselves, share your darkest as well as the silliest of thoughts and know that you will be received with attention, interest and without judgement, that’s when you know you have a true friend.


Unfortunately, there is no magic formula for making friends.  Like a good recipe, it takes the right ingredients. It begins with a shared want and willingness to allow someone else into your life. That acceptance then has to be nurtured as you get to know each other on a more personal level and from there, a friendship can begin to blossom. Trust builds and the friendship develops with the addition of other important ingredients such as reciprocity, generosity, vulnerability, honesty and a respect for thoughts and words shared. The mix will feel right with a balance of give and take where being in touch or making plans to see each other is a pleasure rather than a chore. Over time this friendship will deepen and mature.

Friends are people who you want to see; who you want to spend time with; and who make you feel all the better for having seen and spent time with them. Crucially, they will feel the same way back.


With the seasons celebrations on top of us and as we catch up with those who are closest and mean the most, it’s worth reflecting on, appreciating and being thankful for who and what we have in our lives, as well as all the possibilities that come with a New Year.